Thursday, May 18, 2006

My Fan base leaves me wondering what's wrong with them.

Curious to find out who my fans were I decided to follow in Tornwordo's footsteps and do a Traffic search on my blog. This is what showed up in the search engines that directed people to my site:

pimples on testicles - referencing these posts: 1, 2
emotional damage from childhood enemas - referencing these posts: 1, 2, 3

For the record, I do not and never had any pimples on my nuts, thank you very much. I keep them, clean, groomed and well scrubbed. Two, I never had a childhood enema, and none of my adult ones ever resulted in any psychological fuck up, just a good clean fuck.

Who comes up with these qeuries and most importantly WHY?

15 comments:

Pheebs said...

my IP tracker automatically sends those to me with the site traffic stats...and yes, you would not believe the things people come up with to search..I'd actually written a similar post to yours last year...lol

at this point, I'd really just rather be ignorant and not ask any more questions about the identities of my fans..

St. Dickeybird said...

Pimples on testicles, yes, that one was me.
:(

tornwordo said...

That's the scary part. Imagining the person doing the querying.

Anonymous said...

i am fearful of checking mine... so many possible word combinations, so many filthy minds! hahah!

JM said...

I always get emails about increasing penis size. I want to write these people and say, I'm of Asian descent, it's naturally like that and I don't think pulling it in certain directions is going to increase it's length.

dantallion said...

Geez - mine wasn't nearly as interesting as yours. I need to start including more fetishism in my blog, I think.

Polt said...

BWAHAHAHAHHAHAH!! that is hiLARious!

I've gotten things like "witch triplets in the 1700's" and "dogs tied down" but never anything about testicle acne or kiddie enemas!

I always thought mine were weird, and they are, but they aren't very fetishistic like yours. :)

Oh well, we love ya anyways!

Snooze said...

I don't see anything weird about those queries. Believe me, if I had pimples on princess, I'd be googling for tips as well. But it is bizarre what brings readers to you. I hope they stick around regardless and get the pleasure of knowing you, although perhaps they aren't the sort of readers you're hoping to attract!

Jess said...

Interesting. But I distinctly remember you saying one day over drinks, "Jess, if you ever get pimples on your nuts, the best thing to use is steel wool."

Now how would you know that? ;)

Unknown said...

I get notcied only if I write about scat or something nasty but You'd be surprised at what is a tag word for my site, it's usually something gross. I'm so gald you keep your junk clean. More men need to follow your example. However, women can be just as triffling and sometimes worse which I'm sure flips you out, right?? Stay positve I'd rather be known for nutzits than scat. Nutzits, hum sounds almost like a candybar, eeeeeew!! Kisses sweety!!

sci-fi and super-heroes said...

um just wanted to say thanks for the nice words on my blog. i'm having a blast here with my mom. how would i find out what these searches bring up for me. it's peaked my interest.

The Catshark said...

I gotta hand it to you Epi, you truly keep me laughing! Thanks to you I now have to clean a soda mess that got all over the home office due to my burst of laughter!

But you have peaked my interest too to see what brings people to my site!

Anonymous said...

I reiterate with Jess. How the hell would I know you don't have pimples? I've never seen your man junk. Never been asked to. Never been lovingly looked into the eyes and aske, "knotty...would you like to see the pimples on my nuts?" And I say sure...
kb

Katerina Papadopoulos said...

ROFLMFAO!

epicurist said...

But now I am offended. Somebody did a search on "'ugly feet' pictures" and I came up. How rude!