So after some 2 weeks of procrastination, I finally decided to complete my bloodwork that my doctor had asked me to do. Not being particularly fond of being poked (by needles), I had held off as long as I could, until my Doc's assistant called to ask why I was taking so long. Besides, the damned requisition forms have been sitting in my knapsack the entire time and for some reason when I pulled them out, they had the ever slight aroma of burnt chicken wings and rotten oranges. Go figure.
Anyhow, I got up early this morning half groggy and still slightly dishevelled, and walked to the lab. The lab technician was this petite Filipina lady, with a very Filipino accent, and by the look on the her face, she didn't seem too pleased by the smell emanating from the forms.

She had me sit and then said to me,

"You must bill out deese bields on dee baper broperly, then sit behind curtain num-ber bour."

I nodded and proceeded to sit as told. She then said,

"We do not want you to baint. Did you eat breakbest or did you bast?"

I nodded and said I had not eaten this morning, but was perfectly fine to proceed. I began to question if I should have procrastinated longer, when she pulled out her alcohol pad, and smile at the site of my veins.

"Ohh, deese beins are so big. I will need to take bive biles of blood bor your doctor. Dis will be bery easy bor me."

"Great" I thought, "I have some crazy ass woman whom I can barely understand, who gets her ya-ya's from poking big veins". This all before I even had a coffee to jolt me into reality.
Anyhow, I'm glad I brought a smile to her twisted day. Meanwhile I am nursing my brusied vein.