Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Billy is no longer an Idol

Billy Idol Concert
Devil's Playground Tour
Koolhaus in Toronto
8pm


Alright, not to be bitchy, but the concert kinda sucked.
I went with J to the concert and the first thing we noticed was the large crowd surrounding the building. The second thing I noticed was that most of the crowd was trying to reclaim their 80's youth-hood via lycra pants, lame (and lame) shirts and big hair. I swear I was one of the younger people there (not that I care, really). Amongst the crowd, I saw a number of families (mum, dad with their 2 tweens and 7 year old). I know this was an All Ages Concert, but I guess Mum and Dad couldn't afford the babysitter for the night, so they thought 50 bucks a pop for each kid would be a better choice. Ummm...WRONG.

So, I'm standing in line with these Ajax cougars in front of me, Mum and Dad with kids a little behind me and I'm feeling like I should be at a Saturday morning concert starring not Billy Idol, but Elmo on
Sesame Street Live. Right behind me, Dude, with his girlfriend ran to the front to see if he could bribe himself in front of the line, cause his GF was wearing only a tight mini leather skirt and halter top. He came back complaining that bribes have gone up over the years and they would take no less than 75 bucks each. So they stayed behind me and froze till they got to the front.

J and I get in and b-line for the bar. A few good drinks should make the crowd a little more pretty and less annoying. The crowd is pretty diverse I suppose (Ican't trash that), but I can't get over the crowds of groupies running to the front of the stage. J and I situate ourselves about half-way back with a couple in their 40's who we strike up conversation with. Quite nice and very funny. we kept making fun of the 2 drunk, obnoxious girls and their Urine smelling boyfriend who pushed their way in front of us. None-to-pleased about that.

The concert begins, and I have to admit, I haven't heard much from his new album. It's okay, I guess. His rendition of Mony, Mony was good, but rather long. He also did a rendition of Hot In The City, but upp'ed the Cheese factor to Poutine curds, when he changed the lyrics to Hot in Toronto. Original guitarist Stevens took centre stage a number of times, and I admit I enjoyed his performance more than Idols antics. The theatrics and hip pumping of the 46 year old Idol, were just a bit...umm distracting. I went with some skepticism, and was happy that he lived up to the Cheese factor. The fact that Idol hasn't changed, or aged for that matter (thanks to the knife and Botox), kinda made the whole experience nostalgic in a rather fucked up surreal way. His characteristic Ego, sneer and stripping of shirt was interesting to still see, but kinda out-dated. I was rather surprised by the number of bras and panties that flew on stage, which he promptly signed, or used to wipe up his sweat and gonads, then threw back. I can just imagine those groupies going into their Corporate office jobs this morning, pulling in all the secretaries and other girls to get a whiff of the man's juices.

Uggh, I take it back, I'd rather not picture it.

All-in-all, a rather dissappointing concert. Though I did have fun poking fun. Would have been better if I saw
Dickeybird and hung out with him, but we didn't see each other. Missed him at the
Scissor Sisters Concert as well. Anyhow, I'll be reading his blog shortly to see what he thought. I'll be presumptuous here, but I think we may fall on some similar views.

Oh, and here's a Tip: Drunk big girls with big hair should not jump up and down, nor should they keep throwing their hair back, a la head banging. I spent the night icing my flattened feet and getting the taste of cheap herbal essence shampoo and hairspray out of my mouth.

8 comments:

St. Dickeybird said...

One word:
Ditto
;)

EssentialStephen said...

Somehow I am not surprised. I think his hey day is gone and he, like many of the people you saw, is just trying to reclaim something from days gone by. I think I'll stick to leaving Billy Idol as a fond memory of my youth...well earlier youth as I am still young (OK, everyone, shut up!) he he he

Anonymous said...

Way lame. I mean JESUS he was hot back in the 80s (I saw him around 87) but now he's just a bloated oldster. My memories of him need to remain untarnished.

And I agree re: Phat chicks that hop about and head bang... WTF ladies? Try styling that hair with a little dab of dignity.

epicurist said...

Dickey - Wherefore were art thou dear dickey? You were much needed in my time of despair. Mine eyes and ears doth do protest to the pain of bowing to a false idol.

ES- shut up! your a pup!!

sister - I heard Duran Duran was actually ok. Erasure is actually coming soon, but tiks are sold out. I suppose thats a good thing, since I am a bit more jaded now.

Bees - Phat chicks are cool, just not when they jump up and down on my foot and wear cheap perfume.

Snooze said...

I had a poster of Billy over my bed and I used to kiss him good night, every night, in high school. I still have the poster somewhere, but it looks like Billy's chewing bubble gum as I kissed while I was wearing some godawful bright pink Bonne Belle lip gloss and it seared into the poster. I kind of was sad to have missed the concert, but not now after reading the reviews by you and Dickey.

Anonymous said...

Oh Guys, Seriously. You all need to pull your heads out of your asses. You ought to try it one day , even if just for one hour. YOu go to one concert and don't even pay full attention to it and then come and " Try " to attempt to write a humourous reveiw , but fail dismally. DISMALLY PEOPLE!I can think of a dozen eighties bands that had " come backs " and ended up looking old geezers. The difference here is that Billy Idol has not staged a " come back " ....if you truely knew what you were talking about and were a true fan , you would know that BILLY IDOL NEVER WENT ANYWHERE!!!! He was always there working and writing and striving to better himself.
And your excuse for lameness would be ?

Anonymous said...

You obviously didn't go to the same concert that I attended. You must have seen some Billy Idol imposter, because I (and everyone else I talked to) thought he was amazing. Also, just as hot - if not hotter - than he was when he was younger.

epicurist said...

Anon - We are all entitled to our own opinions and thoughts. Some people like to stick needles in their arms, I don't...whatever turns your crank. Fine. You obvously enjoyed the concert and I didn't. Yes, I thought he still looked awesome, but did that make for a great concert (for me)? No.

And besides, I don't claim to be a music or concert reviewer, and certainly don't expect people to agree or like it. If you are a concert goer as you seem to allude to, you will obviously note that people have preferences and will like what they like. Lameness has nothing to do with it.

Let's just agree to disagree.