A little soul searching

This past weekend I attended the funeral of my best friends grandfather. Though I did not know him, I know the family well, and consider them my own. It was a sombering experience, not because I haven’t been to funerals before, but because death always awakens ones internal conversations about life and what is important.

Expectedly, the whole experience began to churn the wheels in my head about the concept of life and death.

I left the funeral heavy with thought, and realised that my views on life and how to live it have become entwined with my ever changing and growing philosophy. Intrinsically, I believe that introspection and questioning of one’s philosophy brings greater “enlightenment” and happiness, so all these questions and insights are not uncommon to me. When I was in University studying Psychology, I began to resist the whole clinical evaluation of patients and began to assert that without counselling on a more introspective philosophical level, one would never attain true happiness. I do not subscribe to any true “philosophy” because I am not well educated on them to make a formed opinion. What I know of Idealism, Dualism or Plato etc, is all very minimal. By no means am I a Philosophy major, nor do I pretend to be. Those books I have read, have faded long into the mess I call my memory. Despite all my rambling, I do have a somewhat convoluted point, or logic. The logic and rationale that I have, is that there is no one way of approaching life and there is no way of rationalising the human spirit. It is far too complicated to understand.

The one thing that is not hard to understand, is that we are a reflection of our soul and what is happening there. Sadness, anger, hatred, love or happiness manifest themselves in the way we do things, and how we interact with the world. So, why not work on those things to achieve what it is we want? It is safe to say that most people wish for happiness then sadness, or love to hatred. But this is something that only comes from a concerted effort and from observance. Nothing comes out of nothing. One must observe and reflect upon the things that they do and why they do them to move forward in life.

On that thought, I believe strongly that to attain happiness and peace in our lives, we need to face the issues that confront us. We cannot turn away from them , believing that they will go away. If we do not attempt to actualise and fix the things that we believe are wrong within us, we cannot in turn help others. The greatest challenge in the world is to face up to your inadequacies and failures because we are always judging others, but never judging ourselves.

A part of me always says that I am too analytical about my cerebral processing, but I guess it is my attempt to continue to understand myself and the world around me. I am constantly questioning every thing that I know (or shall I say, what I think I know). I begin to argue one thought, but suddenly see the holes in it and begin to re-structure those ideas. I am always in a constant flux, never truly adhering to any one idea. I often find that I begin an idea, riding that thought like a derailed car, just to see where it goes. In fact, most of my cerebral ramblings take root this way, and they never seem to come to the conclusion that I expect.
To compound all this, a friend who was at the funeral started to chat with me about the idea of Soul and Corporeal Body and whether I believed there was an afterlife, or if we indeed contained a soul or spirit within us. The question wasn’t really odd considering my friend is an Acadaemic studying philosophy, but it was asked at a time when I was already being particularly introspective. I told him that I didn’t necessarily believe in a “heaven” or place where our souls went, but that I did believe that we continued to exist in some form or the other. I did not delve into it, as it was not the time, nor the place. The thought however, has been sommersaulting in my mind for the past week.

I obviously can’t be sure of this, but I do not believe our soul or spirit (whatever you may call it) goes to any one particular place. Everthing in this world and Universe is made up of a number of essential things, matter, atoms, molecules, etc. When we die, these things do not simply vanish into nothingness, but are absorbed back into Nature. Our body decomposes and becomes food or fodder for plants, insects and animals, which are then consumed by others, etc, etc. Essentially, we are all a part of each other. As I said earlier, Nothing comes of nothing. We each contain a piece of something that once was part of someone or something else, whether it is the air breathe, or the food we eat. It may seem somewhat disgusting, but that is the reality of it all. Everything is recycled. There is more to what is going on in this world then we think. We far too often fall into this microscopic view of the world, failing to realise that we belong to a bigger picture. Somehow, we are re-absorbed back into this macro-collective.

I had this crazy idea once that everybody we ever met in life was left with a bit of ourselves (good or bad). I believe when I said it, I referred to it as an imprint, and that our memories are essentially an embodiement of our spiritual self. Those that we remember have imprinted more strongly then those that we don’t. The idea is that they will carry a bit of ourselves in them, to carry on our memory and to take with them a bit of our spirit or soul to enrich their own life. Therefore, why would you treat someone badly so that they had a bad memory of you? Maybe the purpose of life is to spread our soul and spirit in as many places and things as possible. I suppose it is somewhat of a karmic theory, but it seems to work for me.

Anyhow, all these working theories are up for argument, but they are the fundamental philosophies with which I guide my life. I don’t expect others to believe or follow them, but they are a good starting place. I always look forward to debate and conversation about these things, so please pipe up.

P.S. On a side not, if our souls are absorbed into this macro-collective, or back into nature, then does that mean that we become both organic and inorganic spirits? If over a thousand years our bodies are layered in sediment and dug up in the form of some rock, like the dinosaurs, then does that mean part of our soul or spirit is in the rock?

Something to think about….or maybe not.